Crazy Random Happenstance

Billy: So good... Hey, this is weird. I ordered one frozen yogurt and they gave me two. You don't happen to like frozen yogurt, do you?
Penny: I love it!
Billy: You're kidding? What a crazy random happenstance!
-Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog

Wednesday, November 27, 2013


Jeff and I recently experienced a break up of sorts. No, not with each other, sillies. With a TV show. It takes a lot for me to break up with a TV show. Especially one that I have watched for a really long time and invested a good portion of my evenings to but when all I do is sit and yell at the television and the stupid characters in the show, you just have to call it a day, you know?

Our recent break up was with Bones. We just couldn't take it anymore. As much as I adore David Boreanaz as Booth and John Francis Daley as Sweets (really, he was the only reason we held on as long as we did) and T.J. Thyne as Hodgins, we just could not get passed Michaela Conlin's, Angela. Every episode was the same thing. Murder, discuss how to solve the murder, oh no! We can't figure the case out... but WAIT! Angela, who is a great ARTIST will completely reconstruct the crime scene and rewrite a computer program and figure out the shoe size of the suspect all from the way the victim's nose was shaped and BOOM! Case solved. Way to go, Angela- who has no background whatsoever in Forensic Science and/or Criminology. Way to put those artistic skills to use! It wasn't just Angela though that we were sick of. I got tired of Brennan's character being so inconsistent. She would be an emotionless robot in one scene and the next, she is crying over one of the victims. Sometimes she would be super mean to everyone and the next, she is all happy happy with them. It was just frustrating. A character is supposed to progress over nine seasons and I just feel like hers went back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. Their wedding episode sealed the deal for us. That's when we decided to stop watching. The second they said that the church burned down right before they were supposed to have their rehearsal dinner, I was done. Dumb. If you are going to have an episode where your two main characters (who have been pining after one another for 9 seasons) get married, THEN JUST HAVE THEM GET MARRIED. None of this annoying hoopla to spice up the episode. The church burned down? No. Don't have all the Squints running around trying to frantically solve the case so Brennan makes it to her wedding on time. It's stupid and I felt like it was disrespectful to the fans. Sure, the wedding itself was nice but that only took up about 5 minutes (if that) of the episode.

So anyway, we are done with that show. It makes me a little sad but I am totally OK with our decision. It doesn't happen a lot but there are a few other shows I have broken up with in the past; I ditched Brothers and Sisters because their terminal cancer storyline with Kitty (Calista Flockhart) was so absurdly unbelievable that it ruined the whole idea of the show for me (also, Rob Lowe left the show but that's neither here nor there). I was so disappointed when the writing took a nose dive. I stopped watching Glee after season two because it was like watching a cartoon with no thematic structure whatsoever. It makes me so angry how quickly that series went from being one of my most favorites to something I mocked.  I stopped watching One Tree Hill in season five when Dan (Paul Johansson, AKA John Sears the sonofabitch) needed a heart transplant and just as he was about to get it, the doctor dropped the cooler with the heart in it outside and a dog ate it. A DOG ATE IT. I left The Office after Steve Carell left. It just didn't feel the same to me when he was gone. I should probably break up with Grey's Anatomy for as much as I bitch about it but I can't. I am ten seasons in with that show. I can't stop now. So I will continue to complain and yell at Shonda Rhimes about her recycled storylines and stupid interns until it ends. Even though I said I would stop watching after she killed off Lexie and Mark...  I am still there, every Thursday. Watching that hospital on my television. It's like a sickness.

What shows have you broken up with??

Let's end the break up section of this post with one of my favorite scenes from Beverly Hills 90210, from the season two episode entitled "Wildfire" where Brenda, Kelly, Donna and Emily Valentine (UGH) perform  "Breaking Up Is Hard To Do" for Hello Day:

Wasn't that fun? Also, two 90210 references at the beginning of this post. How's that for fun??

I'll talk about the Catching Fire movie now. SPOILERS AHEAD. SPOILERS AHEAD. This was my favorite book in The Hunger Games series. I read it in a day. Probably the fastest I have ever read a book. Probably the only book to make my heart pound so much that I could hear it in my ears and probably the only book where I have ever skipped ahead a couple chapters just to make sure a character is still alive. That book is stressful, emotional and so damn entertaining. It's disturbing and heartbreaking and gut wrenching. It is absolutely fantastic and I love it. The movie was no exception. It was SO true to the book. The dialogue was almost exact. The scenes were exactly what I pictured in my head while I was reading it. The coil? The lightning tree? Freaking perfect. The boils from the poisonous fog? The crazy monkeys? PERFECT. When Peeta walks into the forcefield in the arena (that's the part during the book where I had to skip ahead to make sure he didn't die)?  I jumped so high in my seat and was so stressed out while Finnick was giving him CPR that I think I stopped breathing... even though I knew exactly what was going to happen. I thought Phillip Seymour Hoffman was the perfect Plutarch Heavensbee. Effie and Haymitch were phenomenal. Woody Harrelson and Elizabeth Banks are such an asset to that franchise and I could go on for hours (hours and hours) about Stanley Tucci's, Caesar Flickerman. I mean, honestly. Have you ever seen an actor take a pretty insignificant side character and turn them into one of the best people in the films?? It doesn't happen very often. His interviews make me so happy ("This is so exciting!!"). There were a few changes. They were minor and I was totally OK with them. Peeta can swim. There were no Twill and Bonnie to tell Katniss about District 13. Plutarch isn't wearing the mockingjay watch while him and Katniss are dancing in the Capitol and I just realized they didn't do the scene from the book where Katniss goes into the woods and comes back and the fence is turned on. Like I said, minor changes and I'm totally cool with them. Before the movie started, I told Emily that they better have the pearl scene in there. They did and I was so happy. We cried a lot; Every time someone did the three finger salute? Cried. Rue's song? Bawled. That old man from district 11?? So sad! When Katniss was freaking out while Peeta was being brought back to life by Finnick? Cried. Oh, and we didn't remember Mags not being able to talk. I haven't gone back to look at the book, and feel free to correct me on this, but I thought I remembered her speaking in the book? Basically, it is not a feel good movie, that's for damn sure. But it's a fantastic movie. It was so well done and any time a director and producer and screenwriter can make you feel how the book made you feel, I call that a big, big win.

Emily kept a Kiss Count between Katniss/Gale and Katniss/Peeta. She was furious every time her and Gale kissed (which was significantly more in the movie than in the book), however, Peeta came out the winner. I don't remember what the exact score was but he definitely won, so hooray for Peeta!

And last thing about the movie... Jennifer Lawrence is the best. Everyone in the world knows it. If you are not on board the Jennifer Lawrence BFF train, then you need to get with it because that girl is the absolute greatest. 

Am I excited for the Mockingjay movies? Ehhhh. Of course I will see them, but I envision them to be an exhausting six hour cry fest. That book was hella depressing, you guys. I just don't see how it will translate well to a movie... and TWO movies at that. I'm going to keep my hopes low and hopefully that will mean that they prove me wrong.

Billie Joe and Norah Jones just collaborated on a remake of the Everly Brothers album, Songs Our Daddy Taught Us, with their own album Foreverly. It is SO GOOD. Dennis and I have been waiting and waiting and waiting for this record to come out. It finally did this past Monday. I have listened to it over and over again and I absolutely adore it. Their voices sound perfect together and they have a really great chemistry. The songs are mostly mellow and a lot of them are about killing or death but man do they sound good. I think my favorite is "Long Time Gone" and every time I hear "Lightning Express" about a little boy who doesn't have money to pay for his train ticket but needs to get home to say goodbye to his dying mother, so all the other passengers on the train collectively put their money together so he can stay on, makes me choke up like I can't breathe, it is so heartbreaking. And haunting. To quote Dennis; "I think Christmas Shoes was shittlily trying to copy the brilliance of Lightning Express". Exactly. So, take a listen. I love Billie Joe anyway so maybe I am biased but his voice sounds brilliant in this genre of music. I love that I can really hear him sing, rather than all the instruments and background noises that come along with Green Day songs. Give it a listen, won't you? You won't regret it.

I have been reading S.  by J.J. Abrams and Doug Dorst. I have about 100 pages to go and I am really enjoying it. J.J. came up with the concept and Doug Dorst wrote the story. They worked together on all the ins and outs and said that the book is their "love letter to the written word". How cool is that? I don't want to get into the story too much but the book itself is almost like a work of art. There are so many surprises and treasures inside of it that it's like you are living the experience with the characters, rather than just standing on the sidelines reading along. It is the most clever book I have ever read. I have never seen anything like it. Also, please see the picture to the left there. If you are not an Alias fan, this is insignificant to you. If you are an Alias fan, well, you will find that little shout out as much fun as I did last night while I was reading it. I. LOVE. J.J. Abrams. I am hoping that I am just as happy with the outcome of the story as I have been with the rest of the book but in the meantime, you should all check it out... And then talk to me about it. Because it's fun.

Speaking of books... Please, please, please do not buy Charlaine Harris's poor excuse for a book entitled After Dead:What Came Next In The World Of Sookie Stackhouse. Plain and simple: It is a complete ripoff. Not only is this tiny book almost $20, it is not a story. It is an alphabetical rundown of each of the characters. About a paragraph per character. It's depressing and it seals the deal that Charlaine had no idea what she was doing when it came to ending this series. A follow up is fun, sure, however, maybe just post it on your website as a thank you to your dedicated fans. Post an epilogue at the end of the last freaking book. DO NOT make them pay $20 to find out that Jason ends up dying or that Tara and JB split up. Just tell me on your FREE site what Eric, Sookie and Sam are up to and call it a day. Oh, and believe me, I am not the only one upset by this book. I have never ever seen so many one star reviews for a book on Amazon in my life. 570 one star reviews out of 787 total. 570!!! take a gander at that when you have some time. It would make a better read than that dumb book. What a joke.

Just a question that I came up with while driving home from work the other day; Why does the radio still play Smashmouth? Do people actually call in and ask to hear that "All Star" song? I mean, I know that the radio plays all sorts of songs from years ago but Smashmouth? Really? Do people still like them? Why THAT song? Why not Chumbawumba? I don't get it.

It's Thanksgiving Eve. I can't wait to visit with my family tomorrow and eat ALLLL the mashed potatoes. Jeffrey has to work and that makes me sad but since this is a thankful holiday (as all holidays should be, I suppose) I will put a silver lining spin on it and not complain about the fact that my husband doesn't get to eat turkey with me on Thanksgiving because he has to work. I will instead be grateful that he has a job and that makes me happy. There. No negative Nancy's here.

Happy Thanksgiving to each and every one of you! (except for the spammers who relentlessly post stupid incoherent comments on past blogs with their dirty links to their dirty websites. I hope you all have bad Thanksgivings and learn how to not do dirty things).

Eat until your bellies are full, be thankful for your friends and family and all of life's wonderful treasures and shop until you drop if you so choose (just please, do not beat anyone up or get into any fights over some electronic, movie, sweater, etc. that is on sale) Just have fun!

One last thing... Please check out these Etsy sites that a couple of my friends have set up. I (and they) would be ever so grateful. Thanks!

The first is my friend Scott's shop. He'll draw a personalized coloring page of your son or daughter for your son or daughter (or you) to color. He did one of Charley battling Darth Vader and it is AWESOME. 

The next is my friend Liz and her fiance' Kristen's site The Urban Upcyclers: They make lots of cool wood designs. My favorite is the dog leash/treat holder. Check it out and buy a fun art design to hang in your homes.